This may be one of the biggest mistakes of my life. Waking up this morning and going to make a coffee only to find out I bought 2 packages of decaf coffee made me absolutely miserable. That disappointment could only be explained like the disappointment of a 4 year old waking up on Christmas and they open socks first.
My caffeine addiction has gotten to a point where I can not function as a human until I have gotten at least one coffee in my system. Not only will I be a miserable fuck, I will get a wild headache around noon if I don’t get any caffeine in me.
I was so ready to have a coffee, turn on a podcast and relax. But no – I had to be a brain dead moron in the grocery store and buy decaf coffee. I will be looking VERY closely at the k-cup boxes in the store next time to make sure I get actual coffee and not just mud water.
The worst part is I had to go to Starbucks and spend $70 on a coffee. I order a “medium coffee with just a pump of caramel” I do not want milk. I do not want sugar. The Starbucks employees are always absolutely dumbfounded by my order every time and they mess it up 87% of the time. But my wife doesn’t like Dunkin, so I can’t go there.
Now what do I do with these decaf k-cups? Do I drink them and just sit there with disappointment? Or do I just throw them out?
Fuck it. I’m going to drink them. But I will not like it.
A Fan With A Mic 